I'm Not A Mushroom

I belive love is the most precious, important, untouchable thing in this world. In the end, it is all you ever have. I believe that when love is over, it rarely dies a quiet death in a bed of old age. No, love likes to go out in an explosion of color and flame - the phoenix, it starts from the fire, it ends the same way. I think if love didn't die that way, there'd be no way for it to be reborn. I think it's sad that so many people overlook the warnings - the small flames that lick around the edges, the smoke. I believe it's worth crying over, how many people miss the explosion, because they are too jaded, too blinded, or simply too damn tired. I think when people say "It's always the (whatever) who's last to know"..that's because people simply choose not to know.

I think there's so much more to love than just a man and woman rutting like animals in the back of whatever vehicle is readily accesible. I believe the purest moment in my life was when they placed my child in my arms - if you don't believe all of the pain fades away in that second, I think you should try it. And if you think the pain stays gone for long - well, get over that fantasy right now. I believe children are born through all of that pain so that you're well prepared for what comes next. I believe that all of the joy and all of the heartache in the world can be seen in your children's eyes. I believe I wouldn't give it up for the world, no matter how little I wanted it. I believe it doesn't matter if you're 20 or 40 or 60, you are never prepared for a child.

I believe planning in advance is setting yourself up for failure. I believe the best laid plans are the ones easiest to mess up. I believe that being spontaneous keeps you young, and that if you're living by the seat of your pants, you don't have time to worry about how fashionable they look. I believe in savoring every morsel...every morsel of food, every morsel of entertainment, every morsel of knowledge...every morsel of life. This is an all you can eat buffet, there's no reason not to come back for twenty-third helpings, if you can just get yourself to take one more bite.

I believe life should have a soundtrack, and you get to pick what's playing. Wouldn't it be awfully boring if you had to listen to sad music all the time? There's a time and a place to get sad, to get cranky, to bitch and moan - I do not think all the time is the correct time, and everywhere to be the correct place. I believe in being considerate of others, of thinking how your bitching and moaning affects those around you, in the same situations, before you open your damned mouth.

I believe in judgementalism...but judge yourself first, and most strictly. If you hold yourself to decent standards, the first standard you should hold yourself to is to not expect others to feel, believe, think, or behave anything like you. Afterall, I believe we are all entitled to be ourselves, and that means not telling you how to be. However, I believe, as we all affect each other, I need to judge those I allow in on three standards... can I love them? can I trust them? are they BAD for me?... Just remember, you cannot judge a book by it's cover. However, if they wanted me to buy a book, they'd put an interesting picture and maybe a nice blurb on it, cause I hafta pick it up first, right?

I believe...I need to go make anya 5 more levels before bed.
Mebbe more later, if I hear another song that hits me.

(This is all free-association, as always. do not expect any sanity from my babbling.)

posted by Caitlin Sraet @ 3:30 AM